POSTED BY DNF

Labels: Lucky

5:23 AM


Yeay! I'm done with job training with The Esplanade.. a list of 9 modules altogether.. Well, nonetheless, I did learn alot despite of some sleepy occasions during training.. lol.. and late meals.. I'm happy to say now that I will be able to officially start working in Esplanade by late October.. =)

My PP report has also been approved and I'm happy to say that I can now start on my board presentation for the F.P! Way the go... it is also happening in the late October.. but first I have to set a date with my PP advisor to finalize the details.. I was hoping that I could finish it up before Raya.. hmmmm... Right. haha.


Hmm anyways, talking bout Hari Raya.. it is 4 more days before 'Syawal'.... It will be sad to leave this holy month of Ramadan. Everytime the 'takbir' sung.. overwhelming sorrows always hits me. I'm don't know if I did try to make the best of Ramadan this year.. hmm..

Well, anyways, I'm wearing blue this year.. It's NICE man! heh.. ok watever fit.. I bought it like really early..like 2weeks ago.. just want to get the hassle of shopping at the claustrophobic+packed+hot Geylang Serai, done and over with and also to avoid not getting the size that i needed.. My mum picked it out for me AS USUAL. She has good taste in traditional clothes. =)

The best thing about Ramadan is... I ge to spend more time with my family, despite our busy schedules, we do make time to break-fast and 'Sahur' together occasionally which is really great. My dad's helping out at the Bazaar at Geylang this year, selling carpets so he's fairly at home.. =( but yea, we do say HI to him whenever we dropby Geylang for more shopping.. heh. My dear lil bruder kept his promise and did not break his fast unneccesarily and has so far been fasting full till today. I'm like really proud of him.. =) chey deh bah...

Oh yar..My bro will be performing DK barat for Children's Day cum Hari Raya celebration in his sch.. but I couldn't watch him because I have class... boo hoo.. I saw the 'Baju Kurung' he was suppose to wear for performance,he brought it home.. super grand la.. Red with shiny silver dots on it.. he kept practising at home.. so cute. "Ewah ewah.. clap clap**" .. ok I'm crappin'.. Imma noob in DK barat.. hope he had fun performing it!

BTW.. you guys should catch 'MAMMAMIA' .. It's really awesome man.. loved it! Recommended if you are into Abba or musicals. I was like singing my heart out on almost every song.. lol.. there's even lyrics to sing along to.. like karaoke.. best la.. I bet the other patrons were singing along too.. haha.. Meryl Streep was just awesome.. I loved it when she sang, "The winner takes it all.." I did not know that she sings. Cool beans..

My lil sis, Hana will be performing in a school Musical Production, Grease, at ITE College East Simei from Nov 14-16. I'll update more details soon..

Ok i gotta sleep now.. Tomorrow is gonnabe a long day .. of Workinggggg..... Takecare peeps.. Wishing all Family and friends.. Selamat Hari Raya, Maaf Zahir & Batin.. IN ADVANCE.. haha..

k BYE!

POSTED BY DNF

Labels: My Ramadan

10:37 AM


I was reading the entry i wrote yesterday and i was like.. OMGosssh... that's bloody EMO. gaahh... ok I'm all better now.. today.. it's a brand new day.. I dun like literally hate myself.. perhaps only at somethings that i do... Imperfections of human beings.. it's unavoidable..I'm sure all of you can relate to that..

I just finished my work.. today's problem was easier than last week's.. hmm. Thank you God..
Going off to Esplanade later for my second last training module.. Hopefully I won't doze off.. I had barely 3hours of sleep.. zZzZ

POSTED BY DNF

Labels: Random

2:45 PM


I hate myself..
I hate it whenever I looked in the mirror..
I hate the reflection that I see..
I feel like screaming.. but not as much as my heart does..
Crying does not seem to give me comfort..
A temporary remedy..
My soul is dying....
My mind is clouded.. just as my sight..
I can't see..Its too dark..
I messed things up.. just like I did to myself..
and to your life..
Every simple things gets complicated..
You said sorry..
while I should be the one to say it..
You gave in..
Blaming yourself for MY mess..
but still, You did not give up on me..
Holding on to everything that you possibly can..
Never stop giving..
Never expecting anything..
but..
I still hurt you..
That is what I always do..
I don't deserve you..
You don't deserve this..
Your life should be filled with happiness..
but All i did in the end is cause you more pain than less..
I never mean it..
I swear..
I hate myself for causing you pain..
Sorry for everything..
You mean so much to me..
I want you to know that..
Another thing you must know..
You should hate me..
like i hate myself.......

POSTED BY DNF

Labels: im pathetic

2:39 AM


Exhaustion overpowering her.. but she's still awake..
her head's a throbbing pain.. Mind's miles away.. her eyes burning.. The after-effects of the break down.. Body aching.. Feet weary.. Stomach yelling at her.. growling ferociously like hyenas.. Food tasted weird today. Perhaps her sense of taste has decided to take a day off.. her teeth grazing excruciatingly against the ulcer in her mouth.. her heart's pounding harder than usual today.. Breathing was a chore today..

Sick -- that's how she felt..

Vague description of her day..? The whole equation weren't even close.. terrible+horrible+sickening+frustrating=gywgfdyufe!

Pushed to the ground.. helpless.. pounded.. she tried to fight and desperately tried to stand on her feet.. being pushed time and time again by a huge index finger.. She fell flat on her face.. Not even a second was spared.. she embraced her defeat.. Giving in to her fate...

Everything seems to be in fast-forward mode. She's exhausted.... she needs a break.. Someone please help her press the 'pause' button.. The 'stop' button.. whatever..! she wishes for everything to just FREEZE! So that she may take a breather. To be able to pull the cork out of her bottle...

A massive eruption.. It shoots out the uncontainable substance like a glorious shooting star in liquidity form.. through the continuous overflow.. the force of gravity pulling the glass bottle down.. it's fragility tested and it flew aimlessly into a million pieces.. the cold sharp splinters of uncontrollable laughter.. taking a step over the sane line..

Accompanied by sweetness. . and instant takeaways. . To consume.. to swallow down the pain.. Mixed with a slight taste of sea water.. the soul to be beaten up into a pulp by the harsh word called reality.. To fill up the hollowness inside.. Even indulgence seems like a chore..

The sun came out... shines its warmth.. dries up the leakage.. evaporating troubles and worries away.. offers ones strength to get back on her feet...

A beautiful tree grew almost instantly .. baring chocolate coated strawberries... each bite she took.. her soul heals.. her heart, it glows with gratitude...

holding on to the warmth touch..
hopefully to find herself waking up to a brand new day...

POSTED BY DNF

Labels: abstract

2:03 AM


Hi yawww..

New semester starts again for me..
Guess what? I only have 3 schooling days..

Mon-Arts Management Module, class:E24D
Thurs-Stage Management Module, class:E25Q
Fri-Production Design Module, class:E25Q

Time: 8.30am-4.30pm

I did not get the elective that I chose.. 'Sudio Techniques'.. Hmm... Pretty bumbed out about that. Should I choose another elective for this sem..? BUT, I don't seem to fancy the other electives that are available. I guess I'll just take my other 2 electives next semester in 3rd year..

AND you know what? I was absent on the very first day.. LOL. hmm.. woke up late. Tsk tsk.. Ok when I came to sch the next day.. I had a little confusion in the morning.. I went into the wrong classsss!!! Gosh! History repeats itself.. I'm sucha fool. Well..err.. at least I made like.. some people laugh early in the morning...

For my PP, at least there are some progress happening.. still have not gotten the interview replies by the Artistic Director and freelance trainer.. Still waiting.. .. ..

About my laptop problems.. I'm currently on laptop loan with e1rwan Pte Lte. Free for the 1st 11 days and then 10cents charged per day as the duration lengthens.. Contract signed by me on tues, 020908.. LOL. Just lemme know if you need to use it alright.. I'll let you use it and you may still charge me the 10cents for the day.. =D

Fasting has been great so far.. a week has passed.. Let us all make the best of this Holy month of Ramadan to do good deeds.. A simple deed may mean alot to someone and you'll never know it..

Finally I'm working again at The Cathay Cineplex.. worked 6pm-3am on both Fri and Sat. Did Movie Express at level 6 with people like Renee, Afiq, Kamiliyah.. etc.. After 1am, Movie Express closes and I'll have to come down to Concess Level 5. Concess is the main place where corns are popped and Snacks are HOT.. haha.. ok.. I really had a great time working every time i work with these crazy people.. people like.. ''Irwan Babyyy''... HAHAHA.. sorry man.. I can't help it..

ok.. people like Mr e1rwan aka Mr Nice guy.. , Mr Zul aka Mr Cutie, Mr Syazwan aka Mr 6pack and Mr Ramli Choo Jun Ting aka Mr Charming..

We have a new drink on sale at work it's called Jelly POP Soda! AWESOME shitt i tell ya..

Like our Mr Zul has created an anthem for the drink.. "Jelly POP..Jelly POP..Jelly POP SODAAAA..Jelly POP!!" haha.. Its like so stuck in my head noww.. They were singing it out loud while serving! Gosh..funny man..Well the jelly is really addictive.. Do try it at a very "cheap" price of $3.50.. only available at Cathay Cineplexes! hahha..

Ouh ya.. breaking fast together at work is soo much fun.. On fri we all sat on the carpeted floor of the office and ate.. so like kenduri.. (malay function) while sat, we ate in the kitchen. . anyways, Sorry Hana, din't know you were mad at me..

Yadiy and Farouk already left for NS.. Next going off to serve the Nation will be e1rwan(Police) and Ramli(Army)... in early Oct next mth.. =(

Today my sis Hana and bf.. went to the Avril Lavigne Concert at Kallang Indoor Stadium.. so did my elda sis, Amelia.. Cool shitt or whatt... hmm.. Rich people...

BTW, Replug is going to hold our very own concert soon.. It will be held at the RP Cultural Centre(TRCC) on Nov 13th..I'll update more about it as time comes..

"To the world you maybe just one person, but to one person, you maybe the world"

'Thank YOU for sharing your thoughts on me..I'm really flattered and speechless.. and if there's anything that i did that made you smile and be happy.. I'm really glad to be the cause of the upward bend of your lips.. You make me wanna be a better person too. From all the things that that you do and what we have learnt from each other.. You have taught me one thing.. which is... how to love unconditionally..'

Thank you and get well soon.. =D

p/s: Im so not into Blonde streaks and crybabies..ok. randomm.

POSTED BY DNF

Labels: Jelly POP soda Weekend

8:36 PM


Life is sucha MAJOR rollercoaster RIDE!

One point I was high UP! and drastically I was going right down... almost crashing..

Last Sat was a great day to remember..
Gig was fun though the first song 'Beat It'- Fallout Boys version, the sound system was like super haywire.. causing lots of ear piercing feetbacks.. Sorrow - Flyleaf.. I thought I did not screw up that song.. but the audience were standing like as if it's a funeral to that great song..haha.. well, the original song 'What you did' was Ok OK.. I thought it sounds nicer acoustically.. 'Bring me to life' - Evanesence was cool until the point where my voice cracks at the high note.. but eventually the highlight was 'let the flames begin' - Paramore.. though I kinda skipped a certain part of that song.. seriously.. I did not realise it til Madi told me..LOL but it was AWESOME.. love that song.. esp the LIVE version... I thought we did rock the house down as an opening act.. 3 cheers for MMC!

Thank you so much.. My dearie friends and family who turned up.. Cathay peeps like E1rwan, Farouk, Yadiy, Ramli, Zul.. My lil sis, Hana and lil bro, Amirul.. The Replugios, Zaty, Dhiv and Amir... Thank YOU! Love you peeps..!

Then I have Replug performance at the Kallang Rooftop.. I thought 14bux per tic was way too expensive looking at the condition of the venue.. felt bad cuz e1rwan, zul, hana and my lil bro came.. and they paid.. I really really wanted to give out a good show for them and the rest there.. and I'm super glad when they said they did..

Anyways, I sang 'Livin' on a prayer' -Bon Jovi with Zaty.. OMG.. She's AMAZING.. love ur voice babe.. and love ya! haha.. I also performed 'Soulmate' - Natasha Beningfield and 'Unfaithful' - Rihanna.. both with Dhiv.. she ROCKS! love ur redhair babe... heh .. The funny part was, I was singing 'Soulmate' and there was a technical error.. I did not know what to do but I guess I made a wise choice in continuing the song but acapella style.. lol.. w/o music.. the audience was a great sport..Thank God.. they clapped and sang along with me.. This must be one of the best feelings in the whole world.. looking at the audience's response after you've performed.. esp when they clapped and cheered.. the feeling was just amazing.... sweet.

Btw the equipments are from Livin' Forte Jamming Studio.. My bandmate's Alif's studio. Dun play2... haha.. great job.. the microfon sounds great.. anyways, You guys should try to jam there.. location- Tamp.. anything you can contact him at..90937071 to book for a slot..

I hadta leave early though.. so I missed 'Tainted hearts' performance.. sorry babes.. I'm sure you gals rock the house down..! I really loved Wan's performance.. She's awesome man.. esp when she sang 'No one' - Alicia keys.. Zaty's 'Fallin' -Alicia Keys as well rocks! and also 'Shy that way' by both of them.. Power la.. Good show Replugios! =D

That was when I was at the peak of my rollercoaster ride..

My heart was in my mouth.. I thought that I was gonna gag.. the ride was travelling 90deg downwards... My laptop just had to crash! my system crashed!!! and the worse thing is IT Helpdesk said I should send it to ACER! The problem is .. I've used up my warranty and repairing at Acer might cost a bomb.. and I was right.. it was a hardware problem and I had to change my freaking motherboard! which cost a friggin' 600bux.... how tragic can that be? all my stuff gone! everything in my lappy.... including my PP project that will due in a week's time... And the worse of the worse thing is.. I've yet to finish paying the instalments for the laptop and it's already on it's way to 'heaven'...

A big advice to all laptop holders that has the 'hibernating' function or 'Stand by' mode.. DO NOT use it often... let me repeat.. DO NOT use it often.. ok..? that will cause danger to your lappy's health.. that's what I did.. and look what happen.. gosh I'm so stupid...

I always take things for granted... haiz...

Now I'm using the sch comp.. free only for the 1st 10 days.. $2/per day if i continue to use it...

I'm still waiting for my PP advisor to email me my PP scope so that I could start my PP.. this is what happens when you do things last min.....stupid me.

Go away you procrastination diesease!

I really need a BIG indulgence right now.. it's an EMERGENCY.....

Dear Allah SWT.. Please let me face and get through this difficult obstacle with great determination...AMIN..

ps: Happy Ramadan to all Muslims...

POSTED BY DNF

Labels: Rollercoaster Ride.

10:42 PM


SORE THROAT GONE AND AWAYYYY PLEASSSEEEEEE.....

So worried man..
My throat is still sore..
been the 3rd day.. =(
drank lots of water, take Strepsils (sponsored by e1rwan PTE) hehe.. tanx youssss! , drank warm herbal chrysanthemum tea which i bought.. and also Honey lemon drink made by aan...tanxxx yousss dearsss!.. avoid fried and spicy stuff.. what should I do next..? anyone has good method in fast remedy to sore throats..?

haha.. I'm going to try to gargle salt water later.. was googling for curing methods.. hopefully it works..

*sigh* this sore throat..
I guess there's no one to blame but myself..
Tomorrow is GIG day..
For those planning to come..
A BIG THANK YOU for your support..=)
We will try my best to put up a great show especially for you guys..

Insyaallah -- With God's will.. hopefully.

afterall we have..
Alif the rockin' rythmist.. --bitchy.. LOL
Muddy the cool headbanging bassist --Screamerrr?? hahaha..
Aan from Knightwingssss..wuhoo --his guitar skills+voice gives you wings...
Izan the hardcore drumma..--Ignition is RISINGGG arh!

and me! --Rock chick wannabe (my blog theme) heh..

Mercy May Cry -- That's US..

How to get there?

By MRT:

From Raffles Place Station, take exit H and walk across Cavenagh Bridge.

From City Hall Station, take exit B (in front of capitol building), turn left, walk towards Funan Centre and turn left again upon reaching the present Parliament house.

From Clark Quay Station, take exit E, cross the road in front, then turn left, upon reaching the Singapore River, turn right and walk towards the Victoria Memorial Clock Tower.

For more info on how to get there by car or bus:
http://www.theartshouse.com.sg/contact.html

The Arts house, Play Den.

Wish me luck people..

Going to school later..
touching up to be done for our class art masterpiece..

REPLUG will be having a gig too tomorrow night at Kallang.. Rooftop.. About 8pm til 10pm.. A night of acoustic music by fellow Replugios of Republic poly.

--How can a person be so kind hearted and yet doesn't expect anything in return..? One must be an angel in disguise...--

----------------------------------------------------

AN ANGEL IN DISGUISE.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gExhN2szfUk

I woke up this morning feeling kind of blue
and I stumbled out of bed
and dragged my feet across the room
Right outside my front door was
a rose and a note that said 'Somebody Loves You'

But out on the street it starts to pour
and before I get soaking wet,
A total stranger runs to give me the jacket off his back
I turn around to thank him
But he waves me with a smile
I can hardly believe my eyes
He puts on a halo and starts to fly

Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to an angel in disguise

I met a good friend for lunch
and we had a delicious meal
But I forgot to bring my wallet
I felt like an imbecile
But she was sweet,
she gave me a treat and
Bought me a chicken sandwich
To take home for tea
But out on the street with nothing to eat
A man and his shopping cart go
Travelling to places,
Collecting social graces
I give him my sandwich and we chatter for a while
I see a rainbow wash over his eyes
He gives me his halo and I start to fly

Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to an angel in disguise

Don't try to hide away from me
I know you're by my side

Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to an angel in disguise

Everyday can be legendary
Every minute, an endless surprise
You could be the next angel in disguise

I woke up this morning
Feeling kind of new..=)

-------------------------------------------------------

I dedicate this song to my twin soul mate for always being there for me in times of need..
Your my angel in disguise. =)
http://www.moonchildpn.org/SoulMates.html

This is beautiful song my Corrine May.. telling everyone that you could be an angel in someone's eyes just by doing the simplest of deed...

Have a good day people! take care!

POSTED BY DNF

Labels: angel in disguise

9:31 AM


At the end of the day today I felt that I didn't achieve anything.

Have you ever had a lot of things that you wanted to do in a day and then you realize that the day is gradually ending without you doing the stuff that you wanted to in the first place..

Wanted to work today but in the end I dun have to.. told my lil brother to revise his studies but it fell on deaf ears.. he played GAME! irritating la.. Btw..I really appeciate that you offer to tutor my lil brother..Really2 thankful.. Thank u soo much.. You're such a dear. Thank you e1rwan.

Tried practising the songs needed for the upcoming gig.. had some problems with 'let the flames begin', the chorus part.. (the song on my blog) and 'bring me to life' was still a struggle.. Sometimes I wonder why the hell do I choose songs that I am not confident of bringing.. Just trying to show off perhaps.. stupid.

When I sing I sometimes feel like I'm shouting out the song rather than singing it which sometimes gets me frustrated.. it's funny.. Something i love to do soo much is causing me frustrations.. I really need to get my techniques right.. went to U-tube for videos on how to hit the high notes better.. this guy called charlesprinceofswing or something like that.. he has like several videos on singing like from part1 all the way to 16 or 17.. he was more like those 'figaro-ish' type of operatic voices.. and really jazzy.. great tips.. but needs time to nurture and a lot of practise.

"It's not all about the breathing.. breathing is only 10%.. If proper breathing is the most essential element in singing, the greatest athletes of the world will be the best singers.. which they ARE NOT!"

-quoted by Mr Charlesprinceofswing- (haha)

OMG..

I really feel like I can't control my emotions nowadays..

-that time of the month- it really sucks.. with these stupid cramps.. fuck! (here i go again with all the vulgarities...)

and not only that.. I get moody. Yesterday was Aan's Birthday.. had something in mind.. a so called plan to go to sentosa.. but he said that he's having dinner with his family at night.. I have nooo idea why this stupid temper has to flare off.. He's having dinner with his FAMILY for god's sake.. why the hell are you flippin' out for...?? I'm being totally ridiculous.. I was actually REALLY UPSET! for an hour before I get a grip of myself.. fight my stupid EMO disease. I changed my plans to meet him up earlier and everything was solved... that was easy right?stupid temper. ......!!! He wasn't aware of me being mad for that.... I'm such a big faker. haiz..

Anyways.. I really had a great time yesterday.. tanx ida for the sentosa luge and skyride thingy.. Skyide was terrifying..--height phobia.. I even enjoyed the dinner with his family..at Sakura. Bought him levis jeans and a silver bracelet..Made him a compilation video of us..He loved it.. which I'm glad..Thought it might be a lil cheesy for a rocker like him..hmm.. Anyways, Happy 25th Birthday dear..and 1year Anniversary..

Today I was pretty bumbed out that I didn't get to work.. but people has my best interest at heart.. how appreciative can I be? But no.. I just had 'merajuk'..get emo-ish.. poor fella had to apologize alot of times for thinking about my well-being.. I am such an ASS. A big one.. Sorry Mutton! Didn't mean to show my temper..Sorryyyyy! and plz dun apologize ok..

Was U-tubing and saw the live version of 'let the flames begin'.. there's kind of a drum solo before the song officially starts which was pretty cool.. knowing the capabilities of our current drummer.. I had send him the link of the video via msn.. I asked him..how? can try? Without trying at all.. all he said was.. I can't do drum solos and "mase dah suntuk.." which means not enough time.. so much for a drummer that I respect.. why is it so difficult to say.. ok I'll try.. is that so much to ask for..?

The company I'm suppose to work with for a few events didn't get back to me.. I'm so gonna be frggin' broke end of this month... haiz.. stupid.. Seelah..don't give constraints somemore.. I'm such an idiot.. the esplanade job--still under training course.

Found out that A'an had to sing for tomorrow's concert at Haogang stadium.. with Ignition. He was suppose to go watch it with me la. Now I have to go alone! sucks big time.

wth la..

Now I'm going to hide under the covers

and cry....

Sorry if any of things said above offended anyone. I'm currently having mood SWINGGGGGSSS! I'm being unreasonable and sickeningly temperamental... Stay away from this grumpyfit for at least a few more days...

POSTED BY DNF

Labels: I kill you

11:56 PM

Labels: So near yet so far

12:23 AM

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FEMALE
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TECHNOLOGY FOR THE ARTS

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